Sunshine of My Love

The apartment I live in oversees the roof of another apartment. With this advantage, my apartment gets a bright yellow luminescence every morning. The luminescence always reminds me of the sunflowers my parents used to grow in our little garden. For the past three years, I have always enjoy the gleaming bright amorous sun. This summer, something magical happened. The dazzling tender sun granted me the key to the world of sunflowers.

For some unknown reasons, on the eve of summer, I found myself obediently tucking my alarm clock in the closet. Tired from work, I fell asleep immediately. At the height of dawn... I could feel the sunflower petals gently caressing my face.Semi-consciously, I could hear the flowers articulating in a smooth singsong manner,

"We're large ones and small ones, 

Some dainty and fair,

And even some delicate to wear in your hair.

Come join us, my child, and joyous you'll be!

Leave your work behind and follow the sun,

Swaying slowly without a care,

Gently hold onto our leaves, allow us to lead the way,

One step at a time and you won't feel lost."

Someone knocked on my door, waking a very drowsy me. The knock persisted for abit so I hurriedly wore my over-sized furry slippers and drag my heavy self to the door, wandering who on earth will knock on my door at 7 in the morning. Once I opened the door, I was faced with a young delivery boy who was holding a bouquet of showy, sturdy, magnificent blooms of sunflowers. He looked nervous I could tell.

"Sorry to wake you up." He said.

" I am supposed to deliver this to you before 7:30." He continued.

" Don't worry," I assured him. By now, I am wide awake and curious to know who had send me the flowers. I tipped him and opened the card attached to the basket.

"One step at a time and you won't feel lost. Loved, mom."

I smiled. Suddenly, I don't feel so lonely living in New York City anymore. One step at a time. That's how I am going to start my day. Glancing at the clock. 7:30. Darn! I am going to be late for work if I don't get dress! So much for one step at a time...

Post Card

Lim Kim, I am sending you a post card in the mail today! I found a store in Pinconning that sells beautiful MI post cards so I am excited to share!

Oil Spill

I showed my mom your entry about the landmines and asked her what she thought was the most pressing issue in the US--she said first thing that came to mind was the oil spill. I've been meaning to write about this so here goes!

There are a lot of things in this world where I wish it could be easily fixed. The oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico is one of those things.

I am sad that those 11 oil rig workers were killed in the explosion. And I can't believe how much oil has poured out into the ocean because of the explosion. And it has almost been two months and it is still not under control? To me that is unacceptable. Of course it is hard for me to judge because I am not an engineer who would know how much it takes to fix something like that. I think it needs to be fixed no matter what the cost. I don't think the environment can afford to undergo man-made tragedies such as that.

I also think that BP company should shoulder all costs. In some way BP is responsible for the damage, either because of faulty preventative devices that didn't prevent the explosion, or because they own the rig, I believe that they should pay for it. It would be as if I, an individual, accidentally started a forest fire that burned hundreds of thousands of acres. I imagine I would be expected to pay for it somehow. BP might need to borrow money, but sometimes that is what it takes and there is no shame in that.

I just wish that with today's technology, we could somehow fix this so that no more wildlife, people, plants, etc needs to go through this.

Below is a link to BP website that describes their recovery efforts:
http://www.bp.com/extendedsectiongenericarticle.do?categoryId=40&contentId=7061813

My Job

(photo is from Boyne Falls, MI. That is a ski mountain. We stayed at my Grandparents' timeshare for our 5-year anniversary. It is about a 2 hour drive from our house. This was the first week of February when we took the trip - our anniversary is January 15.)


I thought I would talk about my job since a lot of people ask what I do, and I don't know that when I say I work in New Product Development, they know exactly what it means--sometimes I don't even know what it means when I am super busy and don't know which end is up!

The function of New Product Development is to seek out customer needs and work with the customer to design something that meets their demands. For example, we make material handling equipment and if there is a safety concern when delivering products, we will try to work with that customer to see if we can devise a solution that both solves the problem (makes deliveries safer) and can be made in a reasonable cost so that the customer will buy the product.

Engineers will tell you anything is possible when it comes to building solutions, however in New Product Development we need to help make decisions so that a product is designed to best fit the situation all around - the product cannot be too confusing for customers to use, too heavy, made with cheap but low-quality materials or be so expensive no one will buy it.

The hardest part of my job is to convince people who have more experience in life than me, and people who I am not their supervisor, to get me and others the information needed in order to keep a project running smoothly. It is tough being a tough person for me! My goal is to stop focusing on my mistakes at work and to have confidence I will learn to be tougher where I need to be and smarter where I need to be. I work as a type Project Manager where I need to focus everyone's energies into completing projects and getting products to market. But it is hard sometimes!

I know I hate getting out of my comfort zone when it comes to certain things. But if I never get out of my comfort zone, how am I ever going to change for the better?

The photo above shows beautiful white snow on a ski mountain. What is fresher than fresh snowfall? I hope that my attitude to change and new things at work becomes as fresh as this snow!

What is your job like??

When the Land is Clear, We Walk Without Fear

The function of alarm clock is to make a loud sound at a specific time. Normally, you can just press the button of the clock to stop the sound, or some stop automatically after a few minutes if left unattended. I believe most of you here have the luxury to switch off the ringing alarm clock with the tip of your finger whenever you wish. In Cambodia, where I grew up, we have something contrary, more atrocious and vicious than the alarm clock. We have explosive devices known as landmines bury under layers of soil. In heavily mined regions, the chances of stumbling into landmines are pretty high because in order to survive, we need to step out from our secured area to unknown territories to tend livestock, gather firewood, collect water etc. For kids, exploring outside their house is a means of recreational activity. Even though there are signboards alerting people about landmines areas, oftentimes, forgotten and yet to be discovered landmines act like ambush hunters, nonchalantly waiting for the next unfortunate person. The only times the location of the landmines are acknowledged are when the device(s) exploded right into the victims’ face(s).

Cambodia is one of the most heavily mined areas in the world. In spite of the fact that landmines no longer exist in the capital city, Phnom Penh and many favorite tourist spots; the encounters with the ambush hunters are still a living nightmare for many of those who still live in rural areas. Most governments in mine-affected countries, including Cambodia, do not have adequate resources to care for and rehabilitate mine victims or to facilitate their reintegration into society. The burden of care and responsibility generally falls upon the victim's family. Although for many who had lost their body parts to the hunters, we still share hope that in the future the next generations of Cambodians are able to walk the country without fear when the land is clear. In order to do so, the hunters must be removed. You can help make a difference by starting right now. Whether you have a minute or two, your interest and support can help build a world free of landmines and cluster munitions! Act Now. Help us walk without fear. 

If I Were a Rose

If I Were a Rose

If I were a rose, think of all the good I would do
I would be a source of contentment for the loyal gardener
A source of life on otherwise lifeless graves
A symbol of love in a tender relationship
A prayer for strength to the one fighting for life in a hospital
A dash of excitement for a secret Valentine

I want to be that rose
I want to grow straight and tall
To make the people around me smile
Or cry tears of joy
Or take comfort and solace at the sight of me
And to give people hope when they have none

Lord, help me to be all you want me to be
Help me to be the rose

Daffine, the Yellow Daffodil

My mother disapproves of my friendship with Pin, the Wild Pigeon. For some unknown reason, she gets suspicious when animals or rodents show up around us. I tried explaining that Pin is a bird not an animal but the result is always the same. She never listens.

The only visitors she welcomes are the bees. I love it when Jacob, the honey bee visits. He is a hard worker and a handsome honorable bee too! Throughout every morning, he always asks before he takes my pollen.
"Hello, Daffine," greets the bowing Jacob. "Do you have any pollen for me to carry to another Daffodil?"
"Yes, I do," I say shyly, " and there is some spare for you to make into honey."
"Thank you," glows Jacob, and with that, buzzes off to my other siblings.

I am Daffine, a member of Daffodils. Like my mother, I grew up in a pot. I know we are beautiful flowers but every now and then, I secretly wish I have orange or white pigments on me. Sometimes when I am in a lousy mood, usually after arguing with my mom, I feel more like a sour lemon than a yellow flower. I get into petty arguments with my mother occasionally but still love her dearly. She is the best mother I could have. She is always there for me and always reminding me to stand tall even though I am the shortest bulb among my siblings.

Fluttering and dancing in the breeze, pleasing the human eyes, we are one of the early bloomers in spring; signifying the end of a frigid winter. Like every other year, the humans are going to paint the whole garden and town with yellow balloons, yellow crepe paper, and of course, more yellow Daffodils! I cannot wait to see my fellow mates sprouting from every window, bonnet, lapel, clam bucket and wheel barrow.

Conquer Him with Love

Dearest Gandhi, 

I know you are no longer in this world. But I remember the words you leave behind. You once said, "Whenever you are confronted with an opponent, conquer him with love." However, as realistic as one can be, conquering someone, especially  a stranger with love is difficult. It is a strenuous effort because of issues such as trust, race and money. My opponent is my country's government. My opponent is someone who states and pretends to hold beliefs that s/he does not actually practice. How could I conquer someone like this with love? 

My family, friends and I have tried so many ways to show our love to our country, to show that we are loyal and devoted to democracy and equality. To our disappointment, times and times again, the government's actions, like a sharp scissors cuts our paper-made disillusionize souls into pieces. The Prime Minister introduced the concept of  1 Malaysia in attempt to resolve ethnic and religious tensions in the country. In spite of that, nothing has changed at all. What is worse many departments in the country are imitating the action of the Prime Minister such as the Education Department, Police Department etc. The Chinese and Indians have to work twice as hard in order to get in to a local university.When Chinese call 911 informing a robbery around the area, the police operation is always delayed, allowing the robbers enough time to rob the Chinese house and escape happily. 

We are still lucky to be alive fighting this evil. However, yesterday, an innocent Chinese woman died because of this treacherous system. According to the news, the Malay person at the gas station would not lend the Chinese man a fire extinguisher in order to save a woman's life. His excuse was because the Chinese man might be a robber. And why does he has this mentality? Because nowadays its a norm to witness robberies (usually done by the Malays) who rob and escape without fearing the police. I hope the woman will rest in peace. It was indeed a sorrowful event and unfortunate day for the man who tried to save the woman's life. 

How could I conquer someone like this with love?

The above picture was taken at my parents house a few springs ago. They have daffodils that bloom every year. Daffodils really aren't my favorite flower, I don't really care for them too much. But I like how this picture turned out. And since I know sometimes I begin to like something more after I learn about it, I decided to learn about the daffodil flower.

Their scientific classification is Narcissus, and according to Wikipedia, "The ancient Greeks believed this plant originated from the vain youth, Narcissus. He died after becoming so obsessed with his reflection in a pool he could not leave. The Greeks say that the gods turned his remains into the Narcissus flower. " This flower is also important in Chinese culture as the flower brings good luck. It is the national flower of Wales. It is also a symbol for cancer research. The link below is for the American Cancer Society, and it does a good job of explaining the daffodil symbol:

http://www.cancer.org/docroot/par/PAR_4_Daffodil_Days.asp

So after learning about the daffodil, I do appreciate it more!

My next post about flowers will talk about the rose, as it is Phil's favorite flower, and the main flowers we used at our wedding. I have a picture of a rose he cut for me for my birthday a few years ago.

Worry Worry Worry

Ok, I will admit--

I am a worrywart.

I've always been a worrier. I've always felt that if I thought enough about something, I could fix every problem and make it go away.

But that's not the case! So I am going to list things I would tell a friend or relative who came to me and asked, "How do I reduce stress and worry?" That way, maybe if I see it in writing and know that my friends see it, I will take my own advice!

(is it just me, or does anyone ever feel like they believe it is easier for others to follow your own advice than yourself, haha!)

1. Talk to someone - sometimes it helps just to spill everything out. After hearing the words come out of your mouth, you realize how silly your worries are or you get an idea of how to approach a situation.

2. Write in a journal - either online (like this one) or a personal journal you keep next to your bed. I have a journal next to my bed where I write about my worries and regrets. It does help, but I would like to be more positive and write about positive so it doesn't become a nasty "worry book!"

3. Exercise - this morning I amped up my exercise and felt a lot less sorry for myself than before!

4. Write down all the things that are positive in your life - I should do this more often. I feel bad when I worry about stupid little things at work when there are millions of people starving in other countries. I have shelter, food, a job (even though I don't always like it), etc. What really do I have to complain about?

5. Write letters to other people - I love this one! I write to Lim, my grandparents, Phil's great-grandma and a few others by email. It gives me something to look forward to!

6. Try a new hobby - I picked up sketching a few months ago. Did one good sketch but haven't committed to a second - maybe I will try sketching tomorrow night when I'm home.

7. Be sure to keep a good diet - often if I am too stressed I don't eat or drink enough, or I eat a lot of candy. Plenty of water, fruits and veggies are the trick!

Anyway, those are just some things to think about if you're stressed! What are your tips for when you're stressed?? Everyone is different!

Congratulations

I am on my way out the door, but wanted to congratulate Lim on her new job! I hope your first day was great!!